Ten Twitter Rules

1. Don’t ask anyone to follow you. That’s like asking someone to comment on your blog.
2. Don’t apologize for not tweeting over the course of a few days, we didn’t notice and WE DON’T REALLY CARE.
3. Don’t accidentally tweet a text message. It is an unacceptable accident.
4. Don’t accidentally tweet a Direct Message. It is an unacceptable accident.
5. Don’t promote your party, unless you’re us…and it’s homecoming.
6. Don’t call me, email me, facebook message me, or contact me off Twitter about something I said (to somebody else) on Twitter.
7. Don’t tell the end of a movie, book, or play. I don’t care if the movie is the Ten Commandments, assume that I don’t know the ending yet.
8. Don’t tell anyone where I am, unless you know me VERY well. Sometimes I [bend the truth] about where I am, to protect the innocent. I don’t need you getting anybody [me] caught up.
9. Do not tweet more than 4 tweets in a row without being responded to or interrupted. That’s abusive and will get you unfollowed. You have 140 characters each. Use them wisely.
10. Don’t ask people which jeans/shoes you should wear, which food/drink you should consume or which activity you should engage yourself in during your leisure time if you have under 100,000 followers. It’s corny when millionaires do it and especially corny when you “hundredaires” imitate it.

*please comment on my blog* (it’s a joke people…geez)


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